0.80 (Senses)

To see a World in a Grain of Sand
and Heaven in a Wild Flower,
hold Infinity in the palm of your Hand
and Eternity in an Hour.

getting a pretty thorough experience of this. how the world changes when sound leaves me behind.

what's left is a place that i know to be booming with noise, and yet so noiseless, it gives me a strange serenity akin to that you get watching a slow-motion audioless vid. i don't even feel like speaking because it resonates loudly within my head.

all i do is contemplate the half-world around me. i might not even bother to interpret.

音さん…戻って来ない？

i was wrong. someone or something behind those clouds are doing something to really stop me having my test tomorrow, or better yet, being out at noontime. so i'll stop thinking about it. i believe in miracles as well as blessings in disguise.

i'll always remember the warm feeling (literally and figuratively) when i walk down jalan chempaka kuning to simpang in the lazy, timeless afternoons to have meepok.

and as long as my yu yuan mian smiles back up at me, it'll be sunshine always.

maybe at the time of the 23rd January that just passed, i might have been excited about ORD. who wouldnt? a breaking of chains and acquisition of the liberty i lost for 2 years. but my exhilaration probably went in tune with everything else and eventually, i did not post the 3 big, bold japanese characters "owari"- which means end and incidentally sounds like ORD - that i had been planning on posting.

of course, now that i no longer need to long for ORD, it seems like a faraway bygone now. something small in my life that i'm past caring. right now, the 2 things that matter to me are a job, my TP test, and getting into hall. its 2 and not 3 because i just can't decide which was more important.

and because of this, i made a decision which i know not whether fruitful or rash. hard decisions come when you have to give up something so tangible and near, in order to reach for something only half as tangible. a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, but i still chose the two.

i still have hope, though.